Are you Addicted to 'NO'? Locating the YES! of the Heart

It seems to me that our moment to moment relationship to Life can basically be reduced to a 'YES' or a 'NO'. Let me explain?

This moment and everything in it, IS as it IS, ALREADY. Everything already IS as it IS, even before we have an opinion about HOW it is. Everything IS as it IS, independent of how we think or feel about how it is. This understanding can be summarized in the statement "What IS, simply IS!" This does not mean we must desire or even like 'What IS', only that resistance to 'What IS', is futile. Saying 'NO' to what already IS, is useless resistance, is insane, and even absurd. But we do it anyway. Don't we? Why?

I would suggest part of the reason lies in that when we were very young, we learned that our 'NO' can effect the moments that are about to happen. While our 'NO' does become part of the next moment, it cannot otherwise change the moment that already IS, because? well? it already IS! But our 'NO' can influence and affect the moments that are about to unfold (and sometimes in the manner we desire).

I'm sitting in my highchair as a baby, mom pushing in the pabulum well past the point of full, now flowing over gums, hands, and bib, a pre-verbal inner resistance arises, hands flailing and pushing against, mouth clamping shut, face scrunching up, head turning away, squealing (like a baby)?and finally ?finally mom understands the unspoken yet unmistakable NO that is being conveyed by my sounds and actions, and she finally relents?

We have just learned the power of our 'NO'. And what a power it is. For in our 'NO' lies the power of changing the future. With our 'NO' we say, "I will not allow 'how it is' to continue", and we can begin to take action and move towards 'how it might be'. We start by using our 'NO' to affect our lives, by taking action determined by our desire for things to be other than they are, here and now.

But then we get completely carried away. We become 'NO' addicts and we start to apply our 'NO' where it doesn't belong. We do not simply use our 'NO' to effect change of the future, but instead use our 'NO' in places and situations where it is not only useless, but also harmful. Most often our 'NO' is simply an unconscious and ineffective resistance to WHAT ALREADY IS. Saying 'NO' to WHAT ALREADY IS, is in any other words, simply suffering. A 'NO' without action is simply complaining.

The most common form of useless 'NO' is our unconscious habitual mental chatter. "I wish things weren't like this" "This is so unfair" "Things shouldn't be like this" "Why me?" "I hate this". But that is just the beginning. Our useless mental 'NO' affects us emotionally creating an emotional 'NO' in the form of resistance or closure to feelings. "I' don't want to feel this" "This hurts too much " "I can't stand feeling like this".

When this emotional 'NO' also become unconscious and habitual, we are shut down to not only our emotional pain, but also to our joy as well. This emotional 'NO' then becomes a physical 'NO' where we are physically resisting and contracting, living in a state of tension and stress. We hold our breath as 'NO' to avoid feeling. We avoid eye contact as 'NO' to avoid vulnerability. We zone out, daydream, distract ourselves and live on auto-pilot as 'NO' to avoid REALITY. Half alive, half awake, habitually resisting 'What IS' by thinking and feeling 'NO', we sleepily stumble toward our death.

In short, we live our lives in a state of unconscious and habitual mental, emotional, and physical resistance, avoidance, and denial in the shape of our 'NO'. OUCH! What to do?

Start by noticing: EVERYTHING IS as it IS, however it is. Say 'YES' to 'What IS' and simply acknowledge 'What IS' as it is. Notice that EVERYTHING IS as it IS, however it is. Feel 'YES' to 'What IS' and simply accept 'What IS' as it is. Feel the 'YES' especially in your chest in the Heart area. Feel 'Yes' in your Heart, and simply embrace the IS-NESS of 'What IS'', whatever is. Now deepen your 'YES' through your body/mind, allowing this verbal feeling 'YES' to shine on everything. With practice one can establish and maintain contact with 'YES'! in all moments.

As you move through the days and nights of the changing seasons and cycles of your Life, dive deeply into the Heart of Reality, which is always just as it IS, no matter HOW it is.

Now do this the rest of your Life. Acknowledge, accept, and embrace everything as it IS. Say and feel 'YES' to 'What IS'. Anything else is suffering.

Aaron McNaught is the owner and service provider of a Red Deer based company called: Aaron McNaught Education/Consultations. He offers varied and unique approaches to Healing, Growth, and Life Exploration. As a personal consultant, Aaron specializes in working with anger, grief, stress, and addiction, and in assisting individuals to restore meaning to their life.

Aaron's main passion is Public Speaking. Drawing upon the gifts of his words and his presence he reminds people of their Enormity and Magnificence. He describes himself as a 'Wake-up Artist', which means he helps people remember or 'Wake-up' to who they truly are, beyond stories and descriptions.

Aaron is the author of a forthcoming book, entitled, Waking Up to Life: Celebrating the Graces of Suffering and Awareness.

He lives in Red Deer Alberta Canada and can be reached at wakingup@shaw.ca

MORE RESOURCES:

RELATED ARTICLES

Spirituality: Blues for Buddha
Being critical of Buddhism isn't easy.Buddhism is the most likable of the major religions, and Buddhists are the perennial good guys of modern spirituality.

Create Miracles in Your Life
Until recently, miracles were usually credited to a supernatural power. The miracles in the Bible are a good example.

Mankinds Ten Worst Enemies: #4 Malice
Malice is a great enemy to mankind. It is evil and wicked.

The F-Word
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-Excerpt From The Relationship Handbook: How to Understand and Improve Every Relationship in Your Life by Kevin B. Burk=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-I'd like to invite you to consider a powerful concept.

Gods To Do List - Get Specific!
I know eyebrows are probably raising about now, but let me tell you this works ! How does God know what we want or need if we don't get specific and let Him know ?All you have to do and I do this on a monthly basis and update it accordingly is make a list. I make mine like a grocery list and put the title at the top of the list.

The Storms of Life
Life is full of ups and downs, trials, and tribulations. They are called the storms of life.

How To Change Your Attitudes
What type of person grabs your attention and motivates you? Usually it's a person who is very passionate about what he or she is doing. She's on fire and her excitement floods the room she is in.

Genetically Predisposed to Faith
Have you ever wondered how much faith you really have? If you are like me there have been times in your life when you question how much faith you have: times when you doubt your ability to cope with personal difficulties, and times when the threat of terrorism or natural disasters feels overwhelming. This is the time to strip away your inhibitions and use your imagination to find more faith.

Esoteric Sexual Secrets
AN ARISTOCRATIC UPBRINGING:There are many people who write about sex slaves on the plantation and it surely did exist but it was also the norm in Europe for many centuries. The Polos were not the first who went off to get the prized Tartar women who fetched a large multiple over ordinary men slaves.

Mankinds Ten Worst Enemies: #3 Jealousy
Though closely akin and sometimes used synonymously, John Rawls distinguish between jealousy and envy on the ground that jealousy involves the wish to keep what one has, and envy the wish to get what one does not have.Christine Harris, American Scientist Magazine, makes the claim that "Of the human emotions, jealousy is one of the most powerful and painful.

The Power of Angels -- An Interview With Rose Ann Schwab, Part Two
Rose Ann Schwab is an internationally and world renowned professional clairvoyant psychic medium. Her gifts are finely tuned and have high credibility with 95% accuracy.

Gods Name... Creation and Undoing!
Over the past number of years, while going through my studies and research, information and answers come to the surface that are most astounding. I have come to understand things differently than I was taught in years of Catholic schooling.

What is Prayer?
Prayer from a child's simple bedtime prayer, to the prayers of the most devoted monks of the eastern religions, is something that is done the world over.My dictionary says prayer is:1.

Prophetic Ministry: How to See in the Spirit and Begin Prophetic Words
A Nathan type prophet sees with his eyes. A Samuel type prophet sees with all 5 senses.

Understanding the Gospel of Matthew and Why it Matters - Part 9
Matthew 3:4-6 John Baptizes the People4 Now John wore a garment of camel's hair and a leather belt around his waist, and his food was locusts and wild honey.5 Then Jerusalem and all Judea and all the region about the Jordan were going out to him,6 And they were baptized by him in the river Jordan, confessing their sins.

Spiritual Intelligence: How It Benefits A Person
In one forum, one participant posted this query:I think quite a few of us believe in the inadequacy of traditional science being unable to explain our universe, being unable to explain how to have a positive attitude, and how to live. We believe that possibly, there are no accidents, and the life we are living in is our choice.

Is America Losing Its Religion?
Has America known its finest hour? Are we losing our religion and sanity as well? What is wrong with our society anyway? These are baffling questions that are frequently being asked by more and more people, even the media.From environmental pollution to spiritual pollution, from artificial food to artificial joy - these are the side effects of the pursuit of materialism (a by-product of the American Dream, as we know it).

Animal Totems - Accept the Gifts They Have To Offer You
You can think of your Animal Totems as imaginary guides on your life journey. You might also think of them as Power Animals because each one imparts a special energy, or power, to your life.

Shamanism
Is it really possible that Don Juan could command the movement of Carlos' attention point or time reference point to another dimension that he calls the Nagual and the sorcerer's perspective? Can the adeptness of one person rise to know you better than you know yourself even at the level of the body conscious focus on the material world? Is INFINITY like the multi-dimensional soul which at some point is harmonized in ethics so much that it laughs at the stupidity of the soulful entities exploring the naive denial and rationalizing games our personalities playas we avoid the purpose of our soul? Could Don Juan shape-shift his alter egos and other dimension energy to become the reflection or mirror of the inner character of the student seeking to label something he knows so little about, in an "elaborate" construct that would be akin to a crook yet academically sound? Did he command this laughter response in another that easily?Have you ever looked into yourself so deeply that you "didn't care to apologize" and "found the thought inadmissible"? What a life and so little holes in your soul you would have if only you were so wise and yet, what a curse and quite unlike 'any blessing it would be. Your knowledge of others and their intentions would make you feel so alone and so devastatingly unable to convey to others what games the ego does play.

Trust is Prosperity
A while back the Lord had given me this message which has prompted me to study it further and find out just what He meant. He told me, "Trust is Prosperity".