Self-reliance and potential are two very important values that I'd highly recommend parents teach their children.
Self-reliance refer to the acceptance of responsibility for and the consequence of one's own actions and performance. It is so common to see people blame luck, circumstance or someone else for things that are not up to expectation. If a person want to be successful, he must take responsibility of his action and results, whether it is a positive or not so positive result.
Potential means trying to be one's best self and asking the best from oneself. It also refer to the conscious rejection of mediocrity.
Self-reliance has to do with taking the blame for negative things that happen And potential has to do with taking a little credit and taking the right kind of pride in what we are able to become and able to accomplish.
A person with both self-reliance and potential helps others by accepting responsibility and doing their best i the world Those who don't have these values often hurt others by blaming them and by failing to develop the gifts and talents that could serve or enlighten or benefit other people.
Set Yourself As Role Model
Demonstrate to your children that you value these values and live by the principles. Show your children how you are doing your best to improve. Talk about things you think you're good at and working to be better at them.
For example in our home, I value my family greatly. I want to have as much time as possible with my loved ones and see my children grow and develop in the best possible way. To achieve this goal, I do not like to work for others in a corporate environment. I want to run my own businesses from home. And over the years I have learned and developed the skills and knowledge that allows me to do internet businesses from home and building relationship with people on the net. It is a strength that I am proud of and it helps me to fulfill my goal of having more time with my family. I communicate often to our 4-year-old daughter about this goal and explain to her about the things I do on the internet. She often see me reading books and learning about online businesses. I also promise her that papa will teach her these internet business skill along the way. She is also very happy about what I do because she can now see her dad more often at home.
In setting yourself up as an example to your children, show pleasure in things you do well. Also, be obvious about taking the responsibility for mistakes you make. If you have done something wrong, tell your children "Dear, it is papa's fault. I could have done differently by..."
Watch Your Children
Help your children recognize their gifts and develop their natural potential. We must know our own potential before we can reach it. Your children have their own uniqueness and you can't mould them into whatever you please. Rather, they are like 'seeds' which have their own and distinct gift and potentials.
We can never change an oak into an apple tree. But we can watch and recognize as early as possible who they are - and then nourish and encourage them to be the best of whatever they are. As parents, we must find out who our children truly are and not confirm them to who and what we wish they were or extend our own egos on them.
For example, if your children are talented in arts, music, or sports and have the aspiration to do something related to their talents when they grow up, don't impose your desire on them that they must be doctors, lawyers or engineers. Success does not confine to just certain occupations or jobs.
Praise Your Children
To help your children build self-reliance, you need to reinforce their self-image, individuality and build their confidence in believing in themselves. Research has shown that well rounded and happy children often comes from home with very supportive parents and receive regular praise and recognize from people they love.
Catch your children doing something good and when they do, praise them effusively. When they make mistakes. help them accept responsibility for it and then praise that acceptance to the point that their pride in their self-reliance outshines their concern over the shortcoming.
When our children posses the value of self-reliance and potential, they feel the growth of individuality and self-esteem. If they don't. they tend to become followers in the standard ruts of life. And we as parents can help a great difference.
Article by Alvin Poh, founder of Learning Champ, a parenting wesbite that provides information and resources to parents, who want to help their children develop the important skills and mind set for a brighter future -> http://www.alvinkh.per.sg/learningchamp