We've all been through times in our lives when it was so busy we would rarely have time to ourselves let alone time to contact our family and friends. With every day life moving as quickly as it is, there just seems to be no time to do everything in one day and get a decent amount of sleep so you can do it all over again the next day. It's no wonder why it's so hard these days for a married couple to share a strong relationship. If you feel your marriage is lacking, check out the following advice to improve or even save your marriage!
1. Call them. Yes, this sounds simple and it is! Whether you initiate the phone call or are returning one, it is all based on keeping an open line of communication. Nothing says "I don't care," more than not calling or not calling back. And if you married the person, it's obvious you care about them! So show them! It doesn't have to be a long conversation; not everyone has the time for that anymore. You can just call to say hi and that you love and miss them. If you're returning a call and don't have a lot of time to devote to your spouse that second, let them know that you were just returning their call and arrange a later and better time to really catch up.
2. E-mail them. This flows along with the idea of an open line of communication, only to a further extent. If it's hard for the two of you to talk on the phone, your next solution would be e-mail. You can write out anything to any length and send it to your spouse for him or her to read when they can. However, if you're looking for an immediate response, maybe you should develop your patience because chances are, you probably won't receive that. On the other hand, if you just want to send say, pictures of the family, pets, etc. or just don't need to instantly receive anything back from them, then the e-mail system will work out great. Another thoughtful thing to do is send your marriage partner articles or websites that concern his or her hobbies or interests. It shows that you still care and think about them and want them to be happy even when the two of you are apart.
3. Pay attention. When catching up on the phone or in e-mails, pay attention and really listen to what is being said. You'd be surprised at what can be uncovered! Now I'm not saying analyze everything that comes out of either of your mouths but if something jumps out at you or you keep hearing the same thing over and over again, you should probably consider that to be something important enough to explore further. For example, if you keep hearing about visits to say, Starbucks, and there's no indication that your spouse is tired of it, maybe you should make arrangements to meet at one. The next time he or she is there without you, that special visit you two shared will be on his or her mind and therefore mentally connecting the two of you when you can't be in the physical company of one another.
4. Cherish the time you talk to them. A phone conversation or e-mail may be occasional in your marriage so don't be afraid to say what's on your mind. Yes, there is a time and place for everything and judging that is a whole other subject but if you feel a specific time is appropriate for what you have to say, then say it! You married your fiancé to share a life together and bond on many levels so why hide your true feelings? The key here is confidence. If you feel that strongly about something, your enthusiasm will show through and at least that much will be respected. All I'm saying is don't hold back too much because you never know when you'll get another chance to speak your mind or show your appreciation.
5. Cherish the time you spend together. This may happen even less if the two of you are on opposing schedules so make it high quality and top priority when the plans do come up. You don't necessarily have to go out though. Maybe you could spend a quiet night at home with no cell phones and minimal connection to the outside world. Okay, maybe that seems like a lot to ask but think of it this way, the more distractions, the less continuous the connection will be between the two of you, which will lessen the quality of your time together. If you do want to go out, maybe you could go to a favorite restaurant or see a movie starring one of your commonly admired actors. The more special the activities are that you two share as a couple, the easier it will be to do your own individual tasks. Even if you're dog-tired be thankful you have someone to share a love with and to spend time with whatever time of the day or night it is.
These are just a few simple tips that are fairly easy to utilize and benefit from. If you want to re-ignite the spark between you and your marriage partner, take this invaluable marriage advice. There is so much to gain from the help offered here and it only requires a small amount of effort to put the suggestions to use. I'm giving you this match; now it's your job to strike it, see the flames it will produce, and save your marriage!
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© 2004 Kristin Craft. You may freely distribute this article in your newsletter, on your website or in your print publication provided you include the copyright and resource box at the end. Hyperlinks should remain active whenever possible. Notification would be appreciated but not required.
Kristin Craft is the owner and webmaster of Marriage-Success which provides helpful tips and resources for married couples and those considering marriage. Couples that are experiencing difficulties in the marriage can especially benefit by visiting Save My Marriage ===============================================