See for Yourself : 12 Step Tools Can Bring Happy, Joyous and Free into Everyones Life
We are all familiar with or have heard of the many Twelve Step programs and communities. The reason the 12 Steps are so effective in helping people create happy, joyous and free lives is because it is a program of solution based on principles written so simply that anyone can use them in their daily lives. As partly a Sober Living Coach, agapelegacycoach.com I team up with clients who already have a strong recovery foundation to transition from recovery into enhanced Sober Living. I also coach those who wish to craft and design Legacies of Excellence in all areas of their lives who are not familiar with 12 Step Living. In my coaching career, all of my clients have shared many successes by allowing me to bring them some of the indispensable tools I have come to live by as a proud member of the 12 Step Community myself. Here are some proven effective 12 Step Community tools to add to your toolbox:
1. If you're not the problem there is no solution:
People have tendencies to focus on others being the cause for problems. Waiting for others to change keeps them in charge of how your life looks and moves. Living in this mindset, you might be waiting a very long time for desired results and relief via others' actions. Take your power back and look into what only you can change.
2. If you keep doing what you're doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting:
If your life is not where you want it to be, then investigate other ideas and options. If things are moving well, then remember " If it ain't broke don't fix it!"
3. Check your motives:
The choices and actions we make based on only our plans, schemes and designs for other's lives are the ones that place us in positions to be hurt, let down and disappointed time and time again. When faced with an action or choice, ask yourself, "Why am I doing this?" Although our motives seem sincere at times, there is always a chance that we are operating out of what we want for ourselves. When self-centeredness is the motive, others around us tend to respond in defensiveness and anger.
4. Trust God and clean house:
Trust that God or the Universe will take care of the outcomes. Make sure your side of the street is clear of wrong motives, actions, unmade amends and apologies for your own behaviors. As they say in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, "a business that takes regular inventory rarely goes broke."
5. Watch your expectations:
High expectations - High disappointments? Low expectations - Low disappointments
One sign of living in "It's all about me" might be that you are using your "personal rights" to govern the behaviors of others . Humility and acceptance are the tools when struggling with unfulfilled expectations.
6. Get a competent sponsor and use them:
Mentors, coaches and community add such tremendous value to our lives. Have a solid support network that you trust and then follow their suggestions.
7. If you want what I have, you'll do what I did:
Be supportable and open to using the experiences of your mentors, coaches or support group. Don't question support from others when they offer ideas that make you uncomfortable or suggest a call to action. Just choose others with successful experience and not opinions.
8. By admitting powerlessness, you are actually gaining power:
This simply means to step back and stop operating out of reaction or control. What person, place or thing are you allowing to run your life? This is living from external forces while happy, joyous and free is an internal job for you to master.
9. Stop letting it rent space in your head or stop focusing on the problem:
If there is nothing you can do about it today, and if it is something that you have no control over, focus on productive things to spend valuable time thinking about, like gratitude or the relationships and outcomes that are working in your life.
10. Share experience, strength and hope:
Don't waste you time with people who lead or support others by opinion, embellishing who they are or just plain make things up. You're time is valuable. Surround yourself with people who can really support you through things because they have "been there, done that" and are now where you want to be. Community is invaluable for building thriving relationships and support. We all need friends and mentors who see past our blind spots and will kick us in the behind to get us back on track.
11. Work with others:
Community and support work both ways. Be available for others that need your expertise or experience to learn by or lean on. Give back what is freely given to you. Service work of any kind, such as Habitat for Humanity, The Special Olympics or which ever direction you are pulled toward, will create healthy ways of giving and keep you out of your head should you feel down or isolated or uninspired. Remember, if you're not having fun then something is not working!
Elizabeth Tull is a professional Excellence coach that bridges the Recovery Community and Professional Coaching. She works with those seeking to enhance sober living and communication as well as those who wish to create Legacies of Excellence. You can e-mail her at Elizabeth@agapelegacycoach.com or visit on the web http://www.agapelegacycoach.com
MORE RESOURCES:
 |
 |
 |
RELATED ARTICLES
Getting To The Root Of Unhappiness
Many people live in clutter, emotionally eat themselves into overweight, live in debt, hate their jobs and otherwise live unhappy lives, unable and seemingly unwilling to change. Why? What do these have in common? What is the core issue?
Fear, or rather an absence of love.
Why Laughter Is Good For You
How Laughter Can Reduce Stress and Improve Your HealthA merry heart doeth good like a medicine; but a broken spirit drieth the bones. -Proverbs 17:22Feeling stressed out, angry or sad? Dread going to work?Try this: Open your mouth as wide as you can, bug out your eyes, stick out
your tongue, bring your hands up like the claws of a lion, then erupt in a
mighty roar of hearty laughter.
Sweeten Up Your Life
Sometimes life experiences can be like a lemon-flavored Tootsie Roll Pop. Hard and sour on the outside.
Does Money Buy Happiness?
According to researchers like Martin Seligman, Daniel Kahneman and Ed Deiner, money may be able to buy happiness, but only to a very limited extent. On the other hand, not having money - that is, a family income of less than 30,000 a year - is related to less happiness.
Quick Steps On Being Happier
Want to be happier?Edward W. Smith, motivational speaker, author and TV show host, who specializes in quick tips on how to move your life ahead even faster, offers the following advice.
Happiness Is Truly M.A.G.I.C.A.L. (TM)
The year is almost half over. Many of us are taking the time to reflect, to imagine new dreams and to revise our goals.
Who Controls YOUR Happiness?
Where does happiness fit on a scale of 1 to 10 in your life?Is that a silly question? Who's in control of your happiness??Well, if you want to maintain continued happiness in light of difficult moments then start by identifying your thinking. Often this means that some of the way you think about certain things may need to change.
The American Dream - At What Cost?
When people are asked, "How many of you are content and happy with what you have?" the reply of an overwhelming majority of people is "Not me." And when they are asked what do they want most out of life, the typical reply is "I want to be happy," as if happy is some kind of a place, like Disneyland or Happy Land.
10 Fun Ways To Live An Enchanted Life Today!
I am often asked how I can live the way I do. Who pays me to be a real-life Merlin? It's not as if you can open the paper and read a want Ad for such a position.
Emotional Baggage
We all have them. It has many faces.
Uncovering Your Joy: Using a Personal Journal to Discover a Life Filled with Happiness
Author Tristine Rainer wrote "Happiness within a diary has less to do with the events you encounter in life than with the way you experience the process of living." Because a diary mirrors how you perceive and deal with events, it can be used for developing the capacity to more fully experience joy.
Gratefulness
Gratefulness brings a great fullness to life. The choice to adopt and hold a moment-by-moment attitude of gratitude is the choice that differentiates those who suffer the slings and arrows of misfortune and those who are blessed with a joyous and abundant life.
Self-Worthiness
Worthiness-word origin. Worth and worship both come from Old English weorth, worth value.
Divining Your Life Path Number
The Life Path is determined by the sum that is arrived at after reducing your birth date by adding digits together. This number represents the traits and talents that you were born with and the probable journey you will take during your lifetime.
SOLD! Again! Contrast Can Work FOR You
Have you ever had an experience where everything you wanted had come to you and THEN you discovered something that seemed to spoil the entire event?That's what happened to me last week when everything I asked for regarding the sale of my house was granted--only the sale did not go through.I had been flying so high in the joy of selling my house to the perfect buyer, that I really 'hit the wall' at high speed, when the buyer failed to meet the closing deadline (even though we extended it a few days!).
Poetic Romance
Romance is conveyed in so many different ways.One less commonly used is the medium of poetry.
Happiness. Its Between Our Ears!
Happiness is something we all seek, yet few of us find-Some search for it an acquiring material possessions-Some search for it in experiencing pleasant sensations-Some search for it in seeking the approval of others-Some search for it in the exercising of power-Some search for it in the love of money-Some search for it in the quest for successYes, Happiness is something we all seek, and yet for most it is something that comes, then slips away, to be always just out of reach. Why? Is life really unfair? Aren't we meant to be happy? Are we being punished?The interesting thing is that all these ways that people search for happiness, and the questions they ask when they don't find it, have one thing in common.
Who Is More Likely To Be Happy?
Here's a multiple choice question for you. Who is more likely to be happy?(a) Someone who lays awake for an hour or so at night, replaying the day in their mind and agonising over what could have been, and what should have been.
How To Be Happy
Happiness is a state of mind, so your state of mind at this moment makes all the difference.You need to ask yourself, is it what you want, the thing
that is going to make you happy?If the answer is yes, does this mean that what you have must
not be good enough?We go through life searching, searching for a better job,
better house, better car, better relationship, sometimes for
many people this is a full time "occupation, always
searching!It seems to be a vicious circle for many of us, because the
last job was the better one, now it is not, somehow it's
lost its appeal, just as when you bought your car, it was
going to make you happy but that was only for a short time,
you soon became unhappy once you saw another newer model, so
the car that was your dream car is no longer a dream.
A Model of Happiness
Everyone I've ever met considers happiness to be desirable. There is a whole wing of psychology called "positive psychology" studying things like happiness.
|